HELLO!

Do not worry about how you are to speak or what you are to say, for what you are to say will be given to you at that time…Matthew 10:19

Do not worry about what you are to say, but say whatever is given you at that time, for it is not you who speak but the Holy Spirit. Mark 13:11

When I am in my office I can hear most conversations in the entry way, in the hallway, outside Kaitlin’s/Ruth’s and Bethe’s offices. My hearing, for now, remains acute (sidebar, when I walk down the hallway, and groups are gathered in the Sams Room, I can hear most conversations, so when I enter and answer the question the gathering is pondering, there is a look of surprise…“How did you know we were wondering about that?”). The most repeated line that I hear is, “How ya doing?”, which comes from Bethe. It is her default greeting. It reveals her concern about others. Now that Bethe is away (offering a funeral service for a friend, a former member of the church she served in O’Leary) I am hearing different “opening lines”; Kaitlin’s, Callie’s (our summer student) and Ruth’s. Of course, my opening line is well-known, “HELLO!”. So much so that in my second month here someone (anonymously) left a large white wall hanging “HELLO!” by my door. It now hangs on my wall. What is your default opening line, what words do you begin your conversations with?

During prayer/walk last night I was pondering what it is I bring to conversations, to gatherings, when I walk into a room and there are people already engaged in dialogue? Three answers came to mind. 1) Is everyone one in the room being invited into the conversation, who is standing/sitting by themselves? 2) Given who is in the room, what topic can I raise to ensure all participants can share an experience, something all of us are keen to discuss? And 3) What specific observation can I share, on this topic, can I share that has not already been shared, that is not likely to be shared? If you see me walk into a room, these are the questions, always, swirling in my mind. They are my version of, “How ya doing?” When you walk into a room, what is typically on your mind?

Too often conversations, among even groups familiar to one another, are a series of each person sharing their own opinion or experience without any reference to the others who have shared previously. There are times, when I walk into a room, someone is sharing an intense opinion or experience and the others are thinking “What is my opinion, what is my experience, of this matter?” Variety is a good thing, and multiple offerings can only enhance a conversation. BUT if there is no reference to what others are sharing, it is not a conversation but a series of persons waiting on each other to take a breath, so they can share their thoughts.

There is no better feeling, for me, than when a group of people are engaged in a conversation where all in the room are participating (not everyone likes to say a lot, but a few words from even the quietest person is most satisfying to me). That requires a topic everyone is keen to discuss, to listen to how others experience what we find meaningful.

And so it goes…Peace, Kevin