HELLO!

Fridays are typically my day off. Bethe and Ruth typically “hold down the fort”, only call on me if someone is taken to the hospital or die. I usually work on my sermon and bulletin for the service six weeks in advance (I have sermons and bulletins completed up until June 28^th). Kim tells me, “This is not what a day off usually means”. I explain to her, “Do you know how hard Bethe works, she takes off even less time than me.” Kim is not amused. And…I often fill my Fridays with funerals for families that have no minister, no church connection, where funeral homes call on me.

Tomorrow, I have a unique funeral to plan and lead. The obituary has no information about the deceased, apart from her dates and the names of her family members. In 35 years, I have never offered a funeral for someone I have never heard about, from friends and/or family. I have never offered a funeral for someone I knew absolutely nothing about.

It is never my approach to offer a generic funeral, a “one size fits all” service. I have colleagues who will sit with families and tell them what hymns to choose, what Bible readings to share, etc…It has nothing to do with the person who died or their grieving family, rather it is based on “you should pick this, everyone likes it, it is what we normally do”. That runs contrary to everything I believe. While I would never pretend to have known the person who died when I never met them, I would and do share what others have said, written (online condolences). And from those reflections I build a service, the hymns/readings/sermon, all connect to a larger theme, which stems from the information I have received.

I have none of this for tomorrow. So my plans are these, share Psalm 23 and 1 Corinthians 13, make it clear that each of us, in our own unique God-given gifts, guide others to and reflect as a blessing, love. It’s all about love. And love is eternal and everlasting. I will ask if anyone wants to share a story. This open mic invitation is typically helpful with two exceptions, 1) when there is a “family tension” below the surface someone is itching to share at a funeral or 2) when a born-again Christian decides the large gathering is a perfect opportunity to let others know all about Jesus. I still hear from a widow who has never gotten over the eulogy her late husband’s best friend gave where he never mentioned his friend and only pleaded with the large grieving gathering to do what he had done, be born-again. The widow’s anger remains. If one’s family does not have either of these concerns, the open mic is often a blessing to all. I will not know if either of these exceptions applies tomorrow. But it is worth trying, given how little I know about the deceased. I want it to be meaningful and will do everything I can to make it so. Peace, Kevin