HELLO!

36 years ago, when I began serving as a minister, summertime meant weddings. Even then I could see where we were headed, so I am not at all surprised that I have presided at one wedding in the last five years. Back then, in the early 90’s, the couples were coming to me primarily to make their parents and grandparents happy. Aged 25-35, their focus was the dress, the decorations, the party, their friends and family. And lest you think these large weddings were “traditional”, most of my grandparent’s generation were married at the manse, a small intimate ceremony with minister, the couple and two witnesses. What we now look back on as “traditional” came about with the wars ending and a gradual affluence affording families the “big weddings” we now think of as “traditional”.

At those weddings in the 90’s, many colleagues felt a little bit like the deceased friend in the movie “Weekend at Bernies”, propped up for the photos. I also remember all the “rules”, church policies for weddings. As was so often the case, the rules had less to do with “Christian” and more to do with a specific 1950’s culture. As evidence, the hymns allowed in these rules rarely mentioned Christian content and instead focused on old favorites. I look back at those rules with some quiet amusement.

As many of you already know, Kaitlin and Chelsea are being married on Sunday, and the service itself will be decidedly Christian. There will be scripture chosen by the couple, a sermon, Christian music they love, and most of all, God’s presence in community and discipleship. Christian is not just another word for “traditional”, nor another word for “nice”.

Years ago, I got tired of participating in a service that a) made “traditionalists” happy with restrictions and b) made the couple happy because it was over quickly, with the focus on “walking down the aisle”. So I included Ruth and Naomi’s (Book of Ruth) words to one another as vows and Luke 14, inviting the stranger to the banquet, as sermon. I wanted the service to offer something decidedly Christian, that life is not just about a love story between two familiar people, but a love story initiated by God, to spread to all peoples. And to my surprise, couples attending, who intended to be married the next summer, would ask me to preside at their wedding. People are drawn to a cause larger than self.

At the heart of Ruth and Naomi’s story we see Ruth faced with a decision. Her husband is dead; her brother-in-law is dead. The only family she has left is her mother-in-law Naomi and her sister-in-law Orpah. Both Ruth and Orpah are Moabites, Naomi is from Bethlehem. When Naomi decided to leave Moab and return to Bethlehem, Ruth had to choose-to stay “home” or follow the only family she knows? She decided to follow love.

Why would Ruth sacrifice everything for Naomi? It's quite simple really… LOVE itself. Love is the reason Ruth went with Naomi. Ruth LOVED Naomi. And that’s the kind of love that makes a vow. And I guess that’s what it all comes down to. A big love that’s willing to transcend barriers. A love that’s willing to give up anything for someone else. That’s a love worthy of mention in a Christian wedding ceremony. In various Gospels Ruth and Naomi are referenced in the genealogy of Jesus. Ruth and Naomi are part of our Christian story, as are, here at Woodlawn, Chelsea and Kaitlin.

Peace, Kevin

PS I asked Kaitlin if she was disappointed Adam Sandler is not presiding at their wedding (see Kelce-Swift ceremony in NYC last night). She replied, “we are blessed to have Martha Stewart and Bill Murray marry us”.